Saturday, December 31, 2011

Where on the Dolphin expressway one boy listens to music on headphones to keep car sickness at bay, another boy stops counting the seconds to the Miami airport to say, "hit me, hit me, hit me, it's your destiny," to the third boy who is arguing with his father about whether opening the window will make him hotter or cooler.

Saturday, December 24, 2011

Where the surface of the water off the coast of Miami is the same color and stippled texture as the cover of a motel bible.

Monday, December 19, 2011

Where, on the median of Broadway and 86th street, two men work together to insert the shaft of the second night of hanukkah.

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Where a man in a dirty NY Giants jacket and an "Obama All the Way 2012" T-shirt explains to everyone on the downtown 2 subway that "I was in law school but then the white man done put me prison for twenty year which is where I got eddacated and now my daughter, she in law school which cost $100,000 but I has money buried in Georgia--I'm from Georgia, just live in New York--and that's how I come to be a million campaigning for Obama."

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Where a deeply beleaguered mother stops to look at the liquid crystal display above the multifarious rolls in the window of Associated Supermarket: "ANY TYPE OF COMPLAINT CAN BE MADE THRU: VIAITALIA123@AOL.COM" and wonders what would happen if she skipped town leaving VIAITALIA123's contact info on her kitchen table.

Monday, December 12, 2011

Where a young boy says, "Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Well, that's easy, the chicken—because God created animals before food!"

Friday, December 9, 2011

Where in the dressing room of Equinox gym one half-naked woman says to another, "I gave birth to TWO children with natural childbirth--I figure I can run a marathon, right?" and a third woman (who no one except for a fourth woman watching the scene knows is a professional childbirth educator) says, "I gave birth to two kids too and NO WAY could I run a marathon... But you look very athletic..." adds the childbirth educator when the first woman looks crestfallen.

Where an older woman eating alone at a Japanese restaurant says, into her cell phone, "Oh I already know what I'm getting you--the only thing I've ever heard you ask for."

Saturday, December 3, 2011

Where a bulldog rides a skateboard in Central Park.